Jesus Wept

Rev. Donnell T. Wyche – August 2, 2020

Today, I’m launching a two-part sermon series on grief, called, Jesus Wept.

Grief and mourning can be tricky. I remember when I was grieving that our first pregnancy had ended in miscarriage. I would be at the church, and all of sudden I would burst into tears. I would cry and weep so uncontrollably, I didn’t know what to do. I felt so out of control. This thing that was happening to me, I couldn’t control it. I couldn’t stop it. I couldn’t even name it.

So, I decided to see a counselor about it, and I remember asking, “When will this end?” The counselor informed me that I was grieving this loss, and it would end when it was done. Let me tell you, I didn’t like that answer. I wanted a solution, something I could do (or maybe even take) to make it end. Even after seeking a second option, the only way was through.

The counselor also helped me come to grips with what was under all of my tears, the grief and sorrow, were feelings of being brokenhearted. I didn’t know that I could love someone as much as I loved Hope Esperanza. Maria was surprised by grief. I was so much that all I had was a feeling of being robbed. The feelings of being powerless. After the miscarriage Maria had to get an ultrasound, and I remember sitting in the room with Maria looking at the image on the wall, begging God to do something, anything.

So what do we do with our grief and loss? We turn to the God who knows suffering. Who comes close to those who mourn. We turn to the God who comes close to those who stand outside of tombs. We turn to the God who is present as we try to catch our breath in the midst of our weeping.

We turn to Jesus to see what he did with his grief.

Background on the story:

Jesus was out ministering when he received news that his friend Lazarus had become sick. He continued to minister, and Lazarus died. After Lazarus dies, Jesus heads to Bethany.

Now a man named Lazarus was sick. He was from Bethany, the village of Mary and her sister Martha. ²(This Mary, whose brother Lazarus now lay sick, was the same one who poured perfume on the Lord and wiped his feet with her hair.) ³So the sisters sent word to Jesus, “Lord, the one you love is sick.”

¹⁷On his arrival, Jesus found that Lazarus had already been in the tomb for four days. ¹⁸Now Bethany was less than two miles from Jerusalem, ¹⁹and many Jews had come to Martha and Mary to comfort them in the loss of their brother. ²⁰When Martha heard that Jesus was coming, she went out to meet him, but Mary stayed at home.

²¹“Lord,” Martha said to Jesus, “if you had been here, my brother would not have died. ²²But I know that even now God will give you whatever you ask.”

²³Jesus said to her, “Your brother will rise again.”

²⁴Martha answered, “I know he will rise again in the resurrection at the last day.”

²⁵Jesus said to her, “I am the resurrection and the life. Anyone who believes in me will live, even though they die; ²⁶and whoever lives by believing in me will never die. Do you believe this?”

²⁷“Yes, Lord,” she told him, “I believe that you are the Messiah, the Son of God, who was to come into the world.”

²⁸After she had said this, she went back and called her sister Mary aside. “The Teacher is here,” she said, “and is asking for you.” ²⁹When Mary heard this, she got up quickly and went to him. ³⁰Now Jesus had not yet entered the village, but was still at the place where Martha had met him. ³¹When the Jews who had been with Mary in the house, comforting her, noticed how quickly she got up and went out, they followed her, supposing she was going to the tomb to mourn there.

³²When Mary reached the place where Jesus was and saw him, she fell at his feet and said, “Lord, if you had been here, my brother would not have died.”

³³When Jesus saw her weeping, and the Jews who had come along with her also weeping, he was deeply moved in spirit and troubled. ³⁴“Where have you laid him?” he asked.

“Come and see, Lord,” they replied.

³⁵Jesus wept.

³⁶Then the Jews said, “See how he loved him!”

³⁷But some of them said, “Could not he who opened the eyes of the blind man have kept this man from dying?”

Some Initial Reflections

Jesus doesn’t change his schedule when he learns that Lazarus is sick.

When he arrives in Bethany, he tries to comfort Mary and Martha by telling them he is the resurrection and the life.

I love their response to him, “Yeah, we know you are the resurrection, but our brother wouldn’t have died had you been here.”

Implicit is a plea and probably some anger, “Why didn’t you come when we told you?”

Jesus tries again by telling them, “Your brother will rise again.”

Martha & Mary believe in the resurrection, they just want their brother back with them now.

It’s interesting to me that Jesus does what a lot of us do in the face of grief — try reassure us with words. Stay with me, words of comfort are important, but I appreciate the back and forth between Jesus and Mary & Martha. They want more than words.

They know they will see their brother again in the resurrection, but they are grieving.

Jesus could have gotten angry here…

A retelling of the story with Jesus angry.

²¹“Lord,” Martha said to Jesus, “if you had been here, my brother would not have died. ²²But I know that even now God will give you whatever you ask.”

Look, Martha, I don’t know why you are so upset. He’s not dead, he’s just sleeping. I didn’t rush here because he only need to be woken up.

A retelling of the story with Jesus sharing platitudes about God…

²¹“Lord,” Martha said to Jesus, “if you had been here, my brother would not have died. ²²But I know that even now God will give you whatever you ask.

²³Jesus said to her, “Your brother was needed in heaven, but he will rise again.”

²⁴Martha answered, “I know he will rise again in the resurrection at the last day.”

²⁵Jesus said to her, “I am the resurrection and the life.

As we move through the stages of grief (denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance) God is present with us.

What we learn about grief from Jesus here in John 11 is that God is moved to compassion, deep compassion for us.

³²When Mary reached the place where Jesus was and saw him, she fell at his feet and said, “Lord, if you had been here, my brother would not have died.”

³³When Jesus saw her weeping, and the Jews who had come along with her also weeping, he was deeply moved in spirit and troubled. ³⁴“Where have you laid him?” he asked.

“Come and see, Lord,” they replied.

³⁵Jesus wept.

Those around Jesus remarked on his love for Mary, Martha, and Lazarus,

³⁶Then the Jews said, “See how he loved him!”

Jesus is the embodiment of the God who stands with us at gravesites and weeps with us over our loss. Even though he is the God of life and resurrection. Even though he might know every hair on our head.

Jesus reveals a God who is in “tenacious solidarity” with us as Walter Brueggemann says. Brueggemann decided to translate Hosea 2 use of steadfast love to “tenacious solidarity” rejecting a Greek/hellenistic definition of fidelity as tied up in power, instead, tenacious solidarity is willing to suffer with and suffer for. Allowing us to give up our definitions of a God centered and defined by power.

I love this picture of God.

³⁵Jesus wept.

Even knowing what was in store for Lazarus, Jesus joins Martha and Mary in their grief.

As we consider grief ourselves, we are all experiencing some amount of loss right now. The pandemic is affecting all of us whether is through the literal loss of life, loved ones who have died.

For others it is the loss of security or a sense of control.

Perhaps it is isolation and the grief of being cut off from familiar routines and community.

But we are experiencing grief in a collective way that the world hasn’t seen in some time.

David Kessler, one of the world’s foremost experts on grief said this:

“We feel the world has changed, and it has. We know this is temporary, but it doesn’t feel that way, and we realize things will be different. Just as going to the airport is forever different from how it was, things will change, and this is the point at which they changed. The loss of normalcy; the fear of economic toll; the loss of connection. This is hitting us and we’re grieving. Collectively. We are not used to this kind of collective grief in the air.”

So, our grief is collective. We’re experiencing this together and reacting in lots of different ways.

So I want to invite you to consider some ways to process our collective grief. If you would like to talk with someone about your loss, someone just to listen, please feel free to reach out to me, Pastor Donnell at (734) 649-6173.